The Average Girl's "How To" Guide

Advice on how to live a well-balanced lifestyle

Month: December, 2013

How To: Make a Ruby Gem Piñata!

by Rachel

Piñatas are such a terrific concept. Ridiculous shaped things you get to hit with a stick and candy falls out!
So I made one for Shannon’s holiday party this year.

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1. Find yourself some cardboard boxes and cut 4-6 pieces the same size of this shape.

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2. As seen, tape the edges together to create a prism.

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3. Fill with goodies!

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4. For the top cut a piece of cardboard that fits the hole. Poke a metal hanger through the center for a hook.

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5. Tape the shit out of it.

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6. Cover in red shiny paper (make sure it is paper, foil doesn’t allow the glue to dry, we had a lot of sticky candy).

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And huzzah! You have a great, unforgettable party activity!

What’s Yo’ Beef #19

by Rachel

Rachel

Well, its been almost 5 months of beef, and although I do have some minor beefs this week (people who don’t shovel their sidewalks… COME ON) it’s the holiday season and I am feeling pretty good. So I thought it’s  time for an anti-beef post. What are you happy about today? This week? This year?
My anti-beefs are being done with Christmas prep so I can enjoy the days leading up to Christmas, the fact that I am going to be in one of the most famous cities in the world for New Year’s Eve, and when your fashion choices are confirmed by experts on Cityline. I could go on, but these are the ones that inspired this post.

Shannon

Well isn’t this just a feel good kind of post. Personally, I’m still totally on board for beefs (when your mittens get a hole in them and you’re just too lazy to sew it up, having a drink be just out of reach so you have to move to get it), but I’ll get on board with this, because afterall, Santa’s watching.

I guess my anti-beef today would be meeting new people. Isn’t it the best? Just connecting with strangers, or with people you don’t know super well, like work acquaintances. The past couple of days I’ve been travelling to Western Canada for work, and I’ve got to hang out with some of our sales guys out here. And man, they are the coolest. I think it’s a great reminder that there are a shit tonne of people in the world, and it’s really fun to meet them all.

How To: Dirty Less Dishes

by Rachel

One bowl, 3 meals.

Cereal for breakfast.
Rinse bowl.
Cereal bowl becomes lunch soup bowl.
Rinse bowl.
Soup bowl becomes dinner stir fry/pasta bowl.
Wash.

Also works with plates.

Less dishes, less dishwashing, more energy saved.

How To: Know It’s Time for a Holiday Break From Work

by Rachel

You sing “I hate my job” to the tune of “Oh Christmas Tree” and try to think of new words for the whole song related to disliking your job…. In your head of course.

How To: Fix Bulbs on Ceramic Christmas Trees

by Rachel

This is a pretty specific how to. I mostly just want to talk about this amazing ceramic Christmas tree I found at Value Village. As you can see below, there’s a few bulbs missing:
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I almost didn’t buy it because of this. One of my rules, of course, is to not buy broken crap at thrift stores. But my brain exercises seem to be working because as I put it back on the shelf I figured out the solution:
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Marbles! This is like, my husbands level of problem solving that I have only now reached for the first time.
I hot glued marbles where the missing bulbs were and it is virtually unnoticeable.
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What up!

How To: Play Holiday Kings

by Rachel

Rachel and I co-hosted a holiday party in Toronto this past weekend, and it was pretty kick-ass. In addition to an awesome dreidle-pinata, a James Ready chug-off every half-hour, and being bombarded with a What’s Yo Beef board, advent calendar, and name-drop immediately upon entry, we made up this amazing version of Kings. Let’s just say, it was a hit.

A: Everybody drinks. Because it’s Christmas.
2: For Jews. Don’t worry if you think we’re being all racist, just wait until #4 and relax.
3: Treat Yo’self to 3 drinks.
4: For Goys. See? Now, just take a deep breath, and remember that we’re good people and we love everyone, not matter if they pray to God, G-d, or Keanu Reeves.
5: Give the gift of 5 drinks. Assign other players 5 drinks… You can give all five to one person, one to five different people and everything in between. Don’t forget to sing this like you’re singing the 12 Days of Christmas’ “5 Golden Rings” line.
6: Pretend to eat another player’s leg like it’s a turkey drumstick. Take a drink to wash it down.
7: Point to the North Pole! This is essentially Thumbmaster, where the person who gets this card can point to the North Pole whenever they want, and everyone has to follow suit. The last person has to drink.
8: 8 crazy nights – give 8 drinks.
9: Talk like Santa. This is way funnier than you think. Take a drink.
10: Sit on someone’s lap like Santa and tell them what you wish for. ‘Santa’ takes a drink.
J: Pretend you are opening a present that you don’t like. Take a drink.
Q: Santa Baby seduction: choose someone to sing Santa baby while you lip sync and dance for another player. Both players take a drink.
K: Wears the Santa Beard! Make or buy a white beard and whoever picks a King wears it until the next person picks a King. Take a drink.

What’s Yo’ Beef #18

by Rachel

Rachel

It’s been a “beef with everything” kind of week. MasterCard, online bookings, trip anxiety, snow, hating my job… And then I ran out of tape when I started wrapping gifts yesterday. COME ON!

Shannon

Dude, your beef just sounds brutal. The important thing to remember is that tonight, we’re hosting the most bomb-ass party ever. So really, my only beef this week is having to sit through a work day when I’m JUST SO PUMPED FOR TONIGHT. Like, listening to Styx all day and Miley Cyrus “We Can’t Stop” on one-hour repeat pumped.

How To: Freak Yourself Out

by Shannon

Plan a holiday party when you actually have zero time to, you know, clean your house, prepare the Jello shots, make chain link decorations, plan your impromptu dance routine, and everything else that obviously makes a good party.

How To: Decorate for the Holidays…

by Rachel

Without spending a lot of money and collecting more STUFF!

During the holidays, it is sooooo hard not to buy a bunch of crap for ourselves. We are already spending enough money on gifts and getting enough stuff as gifts, so why spend more money and get more stuff just to decorate the house?
Here are a few ways I have added some holiday decorations from nature, garbage and a few things I already had.
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Things you need:
-an old pallet (often found on curbs and near dumpsters)
-paint and stencils (unless you are a master painter you can freehand)
-a handy person to build the base
And you get this awesome, pretty much free tree. Quote optional. Inspiration from mixedmediamama.etsy.com.

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Things you need:
-green books
-pinecones
This is a pinterest find. You can pile green books and put pinecones or a star topper for a book tree. Or just pile green and red books together with a pinecone topper.

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Things you need:
-soup tins of various sizes
-metallic spray paints (and primer!)
-piece of barn board as base
-dogwood and greenery from nature
Another pinterest gem. Prime and paint the cans and stick them on the board. Once we get a tree I will add greenery to the dogwood and a few more Christmas ornaments and I have a holiday centerpiece!

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Things you need:
-existing vases
-dogwood
-ornaments
No explanation needed.

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Things you need:
-old jar
-fake tree
-fabric scraps
-glitter that doesn’t float
This is a craft from Shannon’s wedding, a homemade snow globe! Glue the tree onto the lid, put water and glitter in the jar, glue and screw the lid and add your fabric. So easy and cheap.

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Things you need:
-old and new Christmas cards
-photo holders (wooden ones are from Shannon’s wedding!)
Just put ’em on display.
Easy as pie… And ginger cookies, and Christmas pudding, and fruitcake…

It’s the most wonderful time of the year

What’s Yo’ Beef #17

by Rachel

Finally it’s What’s Yo’ Beef Friday!

Rachel

My beef today is long ass weeks. For no particular reason, this week seems to be dragging on and on, and I didn’t even work that much! Friday has felt like it’s been a long time coming… But, the weekend isn’t here just yet. Just a little 5 hour break from work, then back for a 3pm appointment, THEN it’s the weekend, huzzah! Also, when the maple syrup cap sticks… COME ON!

Shannon

My beef today might literally be because of beef. Mostly, it’s about being a fatty. Now, I don’t mean in a self-pity, “I’ma put myself down so you can give me a compliment” kind of fatty. I mean like, I ate more pizza than I should have at lunch kind of fatty, and now I have to loosen my belt at the office and hope that nobody calls me about it.

And now I’m going to have more pizza, because I’m comfortable with myself. And my belt size.

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