How To: Not Over Pack

by Rachel

Pack the amount of clothes you think you might need, then remove 5 articles of clothing. Seriously… I packed waaaay too many clothes this weekend!

How To: Annoy Your Husband, Part 2

by Shannon

When you return from a 4-day work trip, just leave your suitcase out on the floor in the living room for a few days.

Bonus if there are still clothes in it you haven’t put away, and your condo is only 640 square feet!

What’s Yo’ Beef #27

by Rachel

Rachel

Perma-B.O. The grossest. You put on a shirt fresh from the laundry, put deodorant on a fresh armpit, and an hour later you smell like B.O? Something is not adding up. It’s the buildup of the little bit of B.O. that doesn’t get washed out with each wash. Eventually, a perfectly good shirt otherwise, smells bad about 5 minutes in. And if you are someone who sweats a lot, the new sweat just empowers the stink more. The bad? You stink. The good? Time for new shirts!

Shannon

Speaking of new shirts, my beef today is not knowing where to buy cool shit. I really love shopping most of the time (or, I hate it. It’s one or the other), but when I’m really in the mood, I just don’t know where to go in Toronto! Tell me your cool shopping stores, World!

How To: Feel a Lot More Organized

by Rachel

I had a minor OCD takeover on Friday, but I feel totally okay about it. My closet just hasn’t been right… Its a jumble of mismatched hangers; plastic, wire, wooden and all different colours… It was a right mess. So thanks to Dollarama and their incredibly affordable hangers (a 7 pack for $2!) I have organized it in a way I can stand!

My clothes are all on white plastic hangers. Husbands clothes are all on grey plastic hangers. My dresses occupy a separate closet and are living on wooden hangers. Coats are on black and blue hangers. And all is right with the world again. There is so much to be said for colour coding.

What’s Yo Beef #8

by Shannon

Shannon

Guys, today my beef is so good that I texted it to Rachel last Saturday, just so I wouldn’t forget. It’s changing rooms without mirrors in them. So that, of course, when you go in and have that J. Crew sweater on that’s pretty long so you’re wondering if you can wear it as a dress because you’re only 5 feet tall and all, you have to go outside of your changeroom so that everyone can see you and judge you.

It entirely defeats the purpose of a safe space, something the changing room is supposed to be the epitome of! A place where you can try on different clothes and get to see for yourself if you like them or not, without having little blond girls with too much make-up and highlights look at you like you’re an idiot. Sometimes if the changing room is like that, I will refuse to go outside it, and just not buy anything, causing the store to lose my well-earned dollars. Suck it, stores. Get some mirrors.

Rachel

I hear that beef sister… My beef today is when you are brushing your teeth a little too vigorously, and one slip of the brush lands it in your gums. There’s a searing pain, a bellowing curse word and bloody spit afterwards. Then, by the next time you brush your teeth, you forget about it… and once it’s been done, for some reason, as if it changed the shape of your mouth, you do it again. And again. And again. It’s just how I brush my teeth now guys, and I feel like I will forever have a raw spot in my gums.

Life is hard.

 

How To: Experience Real Disappointment

by Shannon

Ask someone where they got their sweater because you really like it and you’ve been looking for one just like it and you got up the nerve to ask them and everything, then hear them say, Oh, it’s last season. Joe Fresh, great price. They probably don’t make them anymore.”

How To: Spend $100 At The Gap

by Shannon

Just redeem those lovely, love Air Miles that you’ve been collecting (gee, thanks Metro and LCBO for your bonus points!) for a $25 Gap gift card.

Proceed to not be able to limit yourself to $25, obvi, and spend about a million dollars there.

How To: Go To The Gym

by Shannon

Just look at a photo of yourself wearing short-shorts. You’ll go.

How To: Feel Like You Lost 10 Pounds

by Shannon

Just buy bigger pants, it’s easy.

How To: Feel Trashy At Work

by Shannon

You can’t button your pants all day because your stomach sunburn won’t allow it. You can’t technically zipper them either, but that’s probably just because you ate McDonald’s last night.