The Average Girl's "How To" Guide

Advice on how to live a well-balanced lifestyle

Category: Being Worldly

How To: Blow Your Own Mind

by Shannon

Guys – this is a bit of a serious one here. So go have yourself a wild dance party, crank up the Wiz Khalifa, and come back all sweaty and euphoric.

Here’s my morning thought, that hit me as I was scrolling through my phone, deleting weird old pictures I took of my Kobo when I was reading that book 50 Cent wrote.

Do you ever just stop and think Holy Shiz, I have done so much cool stuff in my life, I can’t believe that I really got to do all this dope-ass stuff.

This is what I was thinking about. I mean, even on my phone, which I’ve only had for about six months, I was blown away by all the adventures it held memories of. Matt and Kim shows x 2 (otherwise known as just non-stop face-hurting goodness), traveling to New York with my bestie, painting my stomach, painting my face, Slumber Parties, denim vests, shot-gunning beers on my roof. And that was only like, two photos.

So here’s where I’m heading. Man, sometimes you just gotta really appreciate all the awesomeness you’ve been responsible for creating. Think of all the cool people that have come into your life and that you remember with such fondess, and then, when you feel sad, just stand on a chair and be like BUT WAIT A MINUTE. I AM PROBABLY RESPONSIBLE FOR SOMEONE ELSE’S FACE-HURTING SMILE GOODNESS. THAT IS AMAZING.

We are all just tiny little blobs of organs and stuff, but one of those organs is a heart, and baby, you’re in mine.

Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm, or probably also a great dance party.”

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How To: Start A Revolution

by Shannon

Guys – here’s what you do. You just meet a dude at a bar who has an Idea Blog, and then you just come up with brilliant ideas.

Here’s my latest one, all about a brilliant little idea call a 2 honk horn.

How To: Build A Girl

by Rachel

This is not actually a how to, but kind of a perfect title for our blog style and will be a fanatical raving about this absolutely awesome book by Caitlin Moran.

I am no expert on books, I am not a writer or deep soulful type person who says things like “This book evoked a lot of feelings in me, and I really identified with the main character”… but this book evoked a lot of feelings in me, and in some ways, I kind of did identify with the main character. I don’t read many books where I really feel happiness when something good happens to a character, or a lot of sadness for the crappy situation they are growing up in, but this book does it. I found myself feeling joy for the good things and real empathy for the bad. Not to mention there are thoughts and phrases from the main character that I, myself, have thought or said myself. It always feels good to know how universal your thoughts can be, even if it is just one, or two other people in the world thinking it. And if you too, are a 29 year old woman identifying with a sexually frustrated 14-17 year old girl, well, that’s ok… you’re not alone.

So go buy it. Like, now. NOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

How To Build A Girl by Caitlin Moran.

Growing up is about keeping secrets and pretending everything is fine

How To: Take Things To The Next Level

by Shannon

Fake mustaches, man. They work for pretty much everything.

Example: Last night I was set to play a pretty intense game of Diplomacy, which is basically Risk, but with a 100 per cent greater chance of ruining friendships.

Now, the game on its own would already be fun. But you know what made it more fun?

Fake mustaches.

Not only will you look pretty sexy, but you will definitely weed out which of your friends are cool, and which ones refuse to put on a fake mustache. (Which means you should borrow money from them, and then immediately stop being their friend.)

I will say, as a woman, when you put a mustache on, you find out a lot of things about yourself. – Carrie Brownstein

How To: Get Supremely Day Drunk in NYC

by Rachel

This is a good and very easy how to guys.

First, go to this restaurant, somewhere near Little Italy, I don’t even know. But I do know, they have the best Sangria I have ever tasted. Ask for it special because for some reason its not on the menu. A pitcher is best.

After this, walk on down to Bowery street and hit Paulaner Brewery. Interesting fact, its the only Paulaner brewery in the states and they have a genuine German Brew master who apprenticed at the Paulaner Brewery in Munich. He’ll make beer in front of your eyes, and he’s super friendly. Isn’t that special? Anyways, in NYC, you will soon learn they have amazing happy hour deals. Its almost worth moving there. Its actually 100% worth moving there. At Paulaner, its 2 for 1 drinks from noon to 6 on Fridays and Saturdays specifically. So, we opted for the litre stein. There were three of us, only two were drinking. We each wanted a different flavour, but our lovely, attractive, Australian with a man bun bartender misunderstood, or we miscommunicated, and he brought us three of one kind of beer, thinking we all wanted a second round of the other kind. What he must have thought of us, I do not know. Some people would be annoyed, but we couldn’t have been happier. Or drunker by the end.

Until we went to our third stop, Dahlia’s, where they make an absolutely delicious margarita. They also have super crispy complimentary tortilla chips and always have the right amount of salsa (its pretty much magic). Don’t stop at 1 margarita, they’re too good. This experience will probably bring you to peak drunkenness for the day. At least it did for us, and turned out to be everyone’s favourite day of the trip!

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer

image

There’s our 3L of beer!

How To: Not Over Pack

by Rachel

Pack the amount of clothes you think you might need, then remove 5 articles of clothing. Seriously… I packed waaaay too many clothes this weekend!

How To: Make The Perfect Road Trip Mix

by Shannon

Rachel and I are going on a kick-ass road trip in July, and needless to say, WE ARE SUPER EXCITED.

Rachel just got a new car, one that has a CD player, and this is big news. It means mix CDs!

In highschool we both had tape decks, and spent long hours putting together the perfect mix. To this day, I can’t hear The Used’s ‘Taste of Ink’ without thinking ‘Train in Vain’ by The Clash is coming up next.

Now, it’s been awhile since I’ve created a mix tape or a mix CD, but I’d like to think I’m up for the challenge.

I like to start off with a big crowd pleaser. Nothing too expected, no Journey or anything, but something that gets everybody going, and everybody excited.

Following that, it’s good to switch up the pace. You can do this by decade, genre, or vibe. Sometimes slow, super sad songs are really fun to sing along to, and who doesn’t like ‘Summertime’ by Mungo Jerry, amiright?

And finally, the closer. It’s gotta be good, and of course, leave everybody wanting more. A solid Beastie Boys is always a good choice, or a sweet singalong song.

What’s your favourite song to throw on a mix, the one that you can’t live without?

Now, go forth, young lovers, and make those mix CDs!

What’s Yo’ Beef #39

by Rachel

Rachel
Its hard to have what’s yo’ beef day when you haven’t had many beefs. Like Shannon’s last post, I’ve just been in a great mood since our trip, and since coming back it’s like I have a whole new outlook on life! I’m not sure why it was this trip and not others, but my priorities have really changed. I have always hated working and never loved my job, but I have really been respecting work a lot more lately, because I know I need it to have more experiences and go on trips. I have been a lot less materialistic because I want to save and I don’t want to spend money on stuff that I’m not going to care about having a year later. I’ve even been watching less TV and on the internet less (I haven’t been on pinterest for two weeks!) because I have been inspired by the people I met and started playing guitar with that time instead. And that’s why I am on such a high still because it has actually made me a better person, according to me.
Now, I actually did come on here to write a backwards beef, when something is so great that it interferes with more great things. Like when you have so many fun plans for the summer, that you are too busy to do other fun things you get invited to because you are already doing something awesome. I just wish there were five of me, and every week we would have a meeting about how much fun we each had.

Shannon

I’m really digging that 5 clone comment and just having a status meeting with each other once a week. I’m all for it!

My beef is similar to Rachel’s right now, in that I want more time. Mainly, I’ve been feeling more creative lately (also a trip side effect), and have been writing short stories and drawing more. And like Rachel, I really want to keep this up, but I just don’t have the time.

As a secondary beef to that, I’m moving in a month, and I stupidly packed all my craft supplies already, so that’s a real bitch.

How To: Achieve That Elusive Work-Life Balance

by Shannon

Dude, just take a vacation. I know that sounds like a quick-fix solution, and maybe it is, but after a week of being back from NYC, I’m still riding high from it.

I typically work 75 – 80 hour work weeks. Every week night, and every weekend, for sure. When I got back from vacation, I was on such an absolute high from it that I just couldn’t keep that up. All I wanted to do was think about how awesome my trip was!

I obviously still have work I need to get done, but somehow it’s really helped me mellow out a bit and realize that work isn’t my main reason for surviving. While I love my job, and really, really love what I do, it’s still a means to an end to do other stuff I also love to do, like go on trips, and meet new people, and eat hamburgers.

Who knows how long this feeling will last, but I guess that just means I’ll have to take another trip.

YOLO!

What’s Yo’ Beef #38

by Rachel

What’s there to Beef about? We’re in New York City!

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