The Average Girl's "How To" Guide

Advice on how to live a well-balanced lifestyle

Category: Being “Healthy”

How To: Eat MORE Vegetables and LESS Bread

by Rachel

First of all, Shannon would NEVER condone this post. I had to wait until she went to Amsterdam to write it!

All you do is use bell peppers instead of bread. See below,



pepper tuna melt pepper taco


Exhibit a) Tuna Melt in a pepper, b) taco in a pepper

Would also work with Philly Cheese steak and even a fritata! (Just make sure it’s a pepper that sits evenly so the egg doesn’t spill out!)

Mmmmmmm delicious!

Make Taco’s, Not War



How To: Put Yourself Into a Good Mood

by Rachel

No matter what!

Make a playlist of all the songs that you love listening to. It never fails. Here’s my list!

  1. In Your Arms – Kina Grannis
  2. Let Your Love Flow – Bellamy Brothers
  3. The Longest Time – Billy Joel
  4. Walkin’ a Line – Foo Fighters
  5. In My Life – The Beatles
  6. It’s Like That – Run DMC vs. Jason Nevins
  7. Trusted – Ben Folds
  8. Extraordinary – Joel Plaskett
  9. Kids – MGMT
  10. Naveed – Our Lady Peace
  11. Don’t Stop Me Now – Queen
  12. Strange Overtones – David Byrne
  13. Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robot – Flaming Lips
  14. Creep – Radiohead
  15. Maps – Yeah Yeah Yeah’s
  16. Santeria – Sublime
  17. Lean On Me – Bill Withers
  18. Satisfaction – Benny Benassi
  19. Big Poppa – Notorious B.I.G.
  20. Come Out and Play – The Offspring
  21. The Message – Grand Master Flash
  22. Chicken Ain’t Nothin’ But a Bird – Cab Calloway

As I type it out I realize how incredibly random it is… little bit of hip hop, techno, rock, folk, country, jazz? and girly stuff! But man I always feel great when I listen to this playlist.

I love it when you call me Big Poppa…

How To: Get Motivated to Work Out (Part 2?)

by Rachel

Listen to Girl Talk’s “Feed the Animals” album. If you still don’t feel like doing sit ups and kettle bell swings, at least you will be dancing yourself fit!

GT: Feed the Animals

How To: Make Schnitzel (Kind Of)

by Shannon

The other night I was at my brother-in-law’s, and his German girlfriend made us schnitzel for dinner. I point out that she’s German because I feel, in a somewhat racisty sort of way I guess? that this makes her an expert on making schnitzel. It’s cool though, we’re friends.

It being 9:30 p.m. and having not yet had dinner after donating blood, my hungry husband decided that this was the perfect time for me to make it. Well wasn’t that nice of him.

This was my attempt:

Step One: Assemble all ingredients so it looks like I’m on a cooking show. It’s very impractical, but Ooh, look at my fancy spice jars that are old sauce jars! Aah, look at my eggs all pre-cracked! The chocolate milk wasn’t part of the recipe, I just really like chocolate milk and was thirsty. Bonus! It’s on sale at Metro for only $1.

Step Two: Shake out a bunch of bread crumbs onto a little plate, along with some parmesan and, I don’t know, oregano? The green spice in your cupboard will do nicely. Mix some eggs in a bowl. Drink some chocolate milk.

Step Three: Take your pork and cover it with the egg, then lay it on the crumb plate. Flip ‘er over and throw it in a pan with oil. Oh yeah, and put oil in a pan and heat it up.

Step Four: Just watch it cook, flip it, and eat it when it’s at that perfect, ‘tender-but-won’t-give-you-food-poisoning’ level.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

How To: Give To Others

by Shannon

Donate blood. It doesn’t cost you any money, you get free snacks, they check your blood pressure for you to make sure your job isn’t as stressful as you think it is and giving you heart issues, and oh yeah, you help save lives.

A man who is good enough to shed blood for his country, is good enough to receive some Bits N’ Bites afterwards

How To: Make Your Own Sushi

by Rachel

Although worth every penny, all you can eat sushi is pretty darn expensive… and little do many people know, it’s pretty easy to make! So get some friends together and make it a party.

All you need to do is…



Photo 1: Buy all the stuff! Sticky rice, roasted seaweed, soy sauce, cucumber, avocado, mango, beef, smoked salmon, crab etc. Whatever you want! Don’t like fish eggs? Don’t buy ’em…

Photo 2: Cook the rice as directed. It should be a wet, sticky consistency. Smear it on the seaweed, and make sure to leave about a half an inch at the edge so when it gets rolled the edge can stick the roll closed.

Photo 3: Put whatever fillings you want! One time, I put sausage, cheese and pickles… not as bad as it sounds.

Photo 4: Roll it towards the empty edge of seaweed! Again, that half inch edge will stick to the outside of the roll to keep it nice and tightly rolled.

Photo 5: Slice it up into delicious bite sized pieces.

Photo 6: Enjoy the heck out of your delicious, homemade sushi, and the money you saved making it. Remember, a little goes a LONG way when making sushi, but also, you can NEVER have too much sushi.

Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what’s for lunch.

How To: Increase Your Appetite

by Shannon

Oversmell someone BBQing burgers. You know you want ’em.

How To: Make A Delicious Meal

by Shannon

Add butter.

How To: Make Leftovers Delicious

by Shannon

1. Eat a potroast for dinner that was pretty good, but would have been really good if you weren’t so lazy and actually made gravy or something
2. Put like, 3/4 of it in the fridge because you don’t have time to eat it since you’re late for your bikini waxing appointment
3. Despair about how blagh it will taste for dinner the next night
4. Decide to buy Pillsbury Country Biscuits and make them
5. Fry up said blargh potroast in a frying pan
6. Put now crispy yum yum potroast on said Pillsbury biscuits
7. Add some old cheddar (the actual kind you buy, not the fridge that’s been in your fridge for months. Throw that shit out, man)

How To: Solve Everything

by Shannon

Make a cup of tea.

%d bloggers like this: